i_amthecosmos: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd]

Back pain or nightmares. Sometimes both.
i_amthecosmos: (beckoning cats)
[Error: unknown template qotd] Cold noodles in peanut sauce. It takes no time to make and it's a good quick lunch. I made some today, actually.
i_amthecosmos: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd]

"Seriously, you tied kids to chairs with red yarn as a punishment? And you never got in trouble for it, at least not as long as I went to that school? You screamed at us, called us stupid, gave us impossible tasks, and-oh yeah-tried to get me held back a grade when I didn't have to be."

"I hope your kid never visits you."
i_amthecosmos: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd] Quite a few times. I was a tiny 12 year old who didn't speak above a whisper and had gotten funneled into the special education system. I was taunted, bullied, and physically threatened by large boys and horrible girls. I soon learned the "batshit crazy" defense was best. It throws people off when a tiny girl who does not talk starts screaming and throwing her desk around. After I knocked a six foot guy on his ass with a well-placed backpack, then put it back on and walked away normally, I didn't have that much to worry about.

Then I took karate, which gave me more displine and control, and also I didn't have to go off half-cocked anymore. Just the fact that I knew it kept things down. It also did wonders for me emotionaly. Not to mention, now if anyone took a swing at me I could just block it and walk away. That was also good for the "look, I don't give a shit about you, so that's why I'm not fucking you up" image. (Junior high is all about image, don't let anyone say otherwise. And my school was brutal-lots of fights and injuries.)

I do regret the "bipolar disorder acting up" violence. I didn't even know I was bipolar at the time. So it seemed really strange to me, not just the people I was screaming and throwing things at.

And, that girl in 9th grade really didn't need to get her lip split.
i_amthecosmos: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd] I'm not sure. The three week boyfriend whose name I don't remember, who was emotionally abusive and I was with for no good reason? But if I erase him, I wouldn't have learned how badly I suck at being a doormat. Three weeks, that was it.

The thing is, I have forgotten most of the people who deserve to be. I can't quite recall who said "fuck you, whore" because I thought they should take the Confederate Flag off the state capitol. I don't even know the names of people who have called me names and threatened my life. I forgot the name of the second grade teacher I had who tied me to my chair with red yarn and screamed all the time. I made a vow that I would hope that she would be lonely and her kids never visit her, and then she disappeared into gray for me.

I suppose I would like to erase getting robbed at gunpoint from my life, but that was an event. I didn't know who the person was.

I remember the events, I remember how they felt. I don't remember the people. There's no need to.
i_amthecosmos: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd] I have a persistant fantasy about opening a "meat and three"-a traditional blue collar type of Southern home cooking place. They are nicknamed that because you get plates that are meat-and-three vegetables, or meat-and-two, or a four-vegetable plate. For those of you who think this is so nice and healthy, keep in mind that a lot of these places count mac and cheese and banana pudding as vegetables. That's not even getting into the fatback or bacon used to "season" the beans and greens.

So, I would deeply love to open one, but the catch is: I want to open one somewhere that isn't the South. I would *love* to see how such a Southern concept would play in Minneapolis. I have it all planned in my mind: I won't have a steam table like most places (which means I won't have as big of a variety to choose from either-seriously, some meat and threes can have two dozen vegetables and five meats), but a sit-down-and-be-served affair. I want it to be homey, but for the food to be fresh and well fixed. I want a few veggie options. I want good southern music playing that is not country (blues, southern rock, R.E.M). I want to convince Minnesotans to eat okra. I don't know what to call it-"Okra and Grits" will just send them screaming. Maybe "Alabama Getaway" if I was a Dead fan. "Sweet Home Alabama" is too overused.

There is no way in hell this would work, but I still enjoy the idea.
i_amthecosmos: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd]The Creature From the Black Lagoon. This is a movie that was so awe-inspiring to me as a nine year old that it is directly responsible for most of my horror interest. It had a *huge* influence on me, and I treasured it for years, not rewatching and let it grow big in my heart and head.

Then, I saw it again as an adult, and oh my GOD it is clunky. Bad acting, bad screenwriting, some serious fucking problems! But it still has the Gill Man, the creepy underwater shots, the beautiful Florida sets. It's got atmosphere, and a sympathetic monster. And sometimes that's enough.
i_amthecosmos: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd]When I was four, I looked up into the night sky and saw a "UFO". I later figured out that it was a plane flying at night. I have a skeptical outlook, but a mind informed by too many sci-fi and horror movies. When I see a small brown thing run across my kitchen floor out of the corner of my eye, I think "brownie or gnome" before I think "mouse in the kitchen!". And it's always a mouse.

The mind can come up with anything it wants, but there is no evidence to support UFO's. Do I believe there is life on other planets? Sure. Do I believe there is intelligent life on other planets? It seems possible. Do I think many, many ships from intelligent life forms on other planets are coming here for no known fucking reason? NO. If they *are* coming, and I am wrong, then Stephen Hawkings is probably right and we should metaphorically run like hell.
i_amthecosmos: (Socialist Fight the Power)
[Error: unknown template qotd] Not really. When our socialist radical buddies were in town, we'd have a barbeque and sing "This Land Is Your Land" and watch documentries on striking mine workers. And I would always play Jimi Hendrix's version of the National Anthem. But then they all fucked off to Atlanta and we still pay dues. Meh.

...They never liked me anyway.
i_amthecosmos: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd] The Wizard of Oz is my fallback movie for bad moods and sick days. Other ones I have used are Better Off Dead, and any of the High School Musical movies-generally the second or third. Wizard of Oz is the best though-it's uplifting and Dorothy Gale is a great character. It also has an entire town of small people singing in merriment when a woman is killed by a renegade house. Love it.
i_amthecosmos: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd]I actually go to some effort not to meet people whose music I really love, but am okay with the occasional accidental star meeting. Working cashier, I've met several celebs this way, mostly American Idol winners/runners up (Alabama had the market cornered on that for a while). Ruban is a hell of a nice guy-I remember his vegetarian phase. The 7th Day Adventists got to him for a while and convinced him to give up meat. He lost some weight, then fell off the wagon. I haven't actually seen him since he got married.

See, I never fangirled Ruban Studdard, since I never watched his season. So to me he's another customer, one I'm happy to see.

Now if someone I really cared about came through my line and said "Hey, do you have any gluten-free bagels?" I would probably pass the fuck out. Adam, Tommy, don't come through my line. Seriously.
i_amthecosmos: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd]Agreed, let people grow it, sell it, and tax it. Make the laws against driving stoned really strong, and don't allow it near schools. It'll have to have an age limit like cigarettes and liquor (each state's choice as to what that is). Rules against being publically blazed unless you are in a stoner cafe. Basically, treat it exactly like alcohol.

It will do me personally no good. I have panic attacks like a motherfucker if I smoke that stuff. I can do that all on my own.
i_amthecosmos: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd] I love a corned beef or pastrami reuban, with rye bread, pickle, sauerkraut, Russian dressing, everything. Hot pastrami is good too. Birmingham, Alabama has a tragic void when it comes to Jewish deli cuisine. I wonder if that one place far, far away from my house is still open. Therefore, I generally make it myself.
i_amthecosmos: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd]This is an impossible question. But I'm going to go with Freaks, just for the disturbance factor. This is Tod Browning (Dracula director) ruining his career! Nobody in 1932 wanted to see a horror movie starring circus prodigies. It was banned in England for decades, and for all I know might still be. But it's one of the most surreal, odd movies ever. Here, have a scene.

So basically, a cult film needs pure fearlessness!
i_amthecosmos: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd]No, because it would not make a bit of difference. Religious people would still be religious. And anyway, since I don't believe in an afterlife, how can I come back from it? If I experience nothing, then wake back up, what kind of story is that? I could tell people "nothing happens after you die", and they would just say "Oh, you just can't remember because God doesn't want us to know."

You can't win with this scenario.
i_amthecosmos: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd]Well, that's pretty much the recipe for hell there, isn't it? If I was 22 forever, that means I would have kept getting tattoos and having anonamoyus sex with people I didn't care about. I would be running from relationships and me and my husband would have never dated. I would just be running the same loop. I'd be at the clubs right now, getting drunk and trying to think of a story to write, but never actually putting pen to paper.

It would be horrible.
i_amthecosmos: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd] I don't think I've ever gotten sick from eating an unknown food. I tend to be fairly food adventerous, and can make a whole lot of stuff out of modest ingrediants. I would rather not eat live food, however.

I don't know, I'm from Alabama and don't consider a lot of game to be that weird. But I've still never eaten squirrel or possum. I do like rabbit and will work out a deal with my hunting relatives that if they give me some of the rabbits, I will give them a gallon of the gumbo I make from them. I also like non-cracker food and will happily eat beef tongue tacos and Korean noodle bowls with tentacles sticking out. (I feel guilty about those. I love squid.)
i_amthecosmos: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd]Mmm, I wonder what this question has to do with me. I'm going to answer in relation to fandom, and discuss other "triggers" too.

I like warnings. People need accurate warnings on fics, especially if they're hanging out in the darkfic communties. I can't handle reading rape!fic, for instance, and have a hard time figuring out why it's so popular. I guess people like writing the emotional journey from trauma? Which is totally valid. But I still don't want to read it, for the most part. So, warn for that. Also deathfic, slavefic (I file that under "lack of consent" as well). And those are my personal ones. I will warn for all kinds of things, since other peoples squicks/triggers aren't mine. I warned for "sexual harressment", even though I had already stated that was the prompt. You know, just in case someone didn't read it.

Sometimes the warning thing gets out of hand: on [livejournal.com profile] metaquotes someone talked about a person who warned for *consentual* sex. This led to the great response "Show me on the doll where fandom touched you..." People sometimes forget that you don't have to warn for everything.

For non-fanfic people, it's good to warn for "triggers"-stories about domestic abuse, rape, eating disorders. I just consider that polite.

But as far as people who just use "fuck" all the time? No. That's me, and I don't apologize for it. "Cussing like drunken sailor" is not in the same boat as "I wrote beastiality fic". (Hi, person who isn't on my friends list. It's okay, you warned for it, I didn't read it, no harm done.)

And of course, actual porn should have warnings and "you must be over 18" buttons that kids can just push and keep on truckin'. Because how the hell can you check?
i_amthecosmos: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd] That's a hard one. I can respect a lot of people. I live in Alabama, I cannot expect everyone to agree with me. I live and let live a lot of stuff.

But I used to be a clinic escort, and while I hold no grudge against people with moderate anti-abortion views, I do elect to hold one against the every week, week after week antis we had in front of the clinic when I was volunteering. I found them to be mostly without any redeeming values, but that was partly the pressure cooker situation we had put ourselves in. In one case, one guy was openly creepy-he was videotaping the numbers on the back of women's cars, to harrass them.

Not everyone who is anti-abortion is like this. I know this. But I wasn't seeing them in their best light. I don't think if I was at a dinner party with me the one time escort on one side of the table, and the ex-local leader of Operation Rescue on the other, that I could stay. Or possibly, he would be the one to leave. One of us would leave. And it's kind of a shame, but that's how it is sometimes.
i_amthecosmos: (Default)
[Error: unknown template qotd] "Alarm went off, I have to get up. Why? I wanna think about pretty boys. I have stuff to do though.

"I need to sleep, I'm tired and it's cold. I wanna think about pretty boys. I have stuff to do tomorrow."

My brain is 12.


i_amthecosmos: (Default)

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