Writer's Block: What if calories didn't count?

[Error: unknown template qotd]Oh, screw you. I would eat the way I normally do (that is, whatever I want). Thanks a lot for this "diets are life" question. This assumption that everyone is one some sort of diet is annoying. Notice it doesn't say "your blood pressure/cholesterol won't be affected", just "your calories wouldn't count".

And fuck, I can't get something better from a magic genie? How about some money, you stingy asshole?